Playboy: The Mansion

Judging games by their covers...

When I first heard the news that Ubisoft would be bankrolling a Playboy-themed game, I almost choked on my imported caviar.

A tasty mid-afternoon nibble with the dude who cleans the office toilets turned into a nightmare as my brain predicted just how crap this game could be.

Next I saw the screenshots and these did nothing to allay my fears. But knowing the game would be popular for obvious reasons, I had to try it out, to let you guys, our dedicated readers, know whether the hype is justified.

So, after slipping the Ubisoft rep a couple of fluffy Wombats filled with gold bullion, the game was promptly sent through to our top secret offices and quickly booted up on the PS2.

Well, don't I look like a duffer? Or maybe it was the 'special sauce' on the caviar?

Whatever the case, Playboy: The Mansion (PTM) is a lot better than I had expected, and is essentially a magazine-making simulation. Think Pizza Tycoon, but swap the mozzarella for kinky lingerie.

As such, PTM tasks players with overseeing the production of the one of longest running magazine dynasties in the world - Playboy Magazine.

In the game, you play a very young, pre-viagra Hugh Hefner, and after listening to the "Playboy Mansion" song that accompanies the intro (and it's a rock song), you start the game in your mansion, though it's nothing more than a multi-million-dollar avant garde crap shack to begin with. The deviant grotto, bowling alley and foam-filled dance floor will have to wait until your coffers are bursting with cold hard cash.

Via the well-implemented (if somewhat tedious) tutorial, you are taught all about the world of magazine publishing, as well as the other activities that you can indulge in to pass the time as the Playboy magnate, such as throwing parties, getting right-royally drunk and jumping on the good foot to do the bad thing.

One half micro management game, the other half The Sims, PTM takes a long time to get through, but it's ultra long shelf life is one of it's attractions. There's so much to do and see and interact with, it's quite inundating at first.

Anyway, there are two options from the get go - mission play (the campaign if you will) and freeform play. Once you've dived into the game and figured out how to chat to people, how to influence them, how to make friends, how to hire and fire staff and how to refurbish and renovate the mansion, the crux of the game lies in getting the Playboy magazine published.
There are six aspects to the magazine that must be completed each month:

1. Cover Shot
The cover of the Playboy magazine

2. Centerfold
Must feature a famous Playboy Playmate

3. Pictorial
Photographs of women in a particular theme - sports, politics, gadgets etc.

4. Essay
An article written by a celebrity - a rock star, director, athlete etc.

5. Interview
An in-depth look into mind of a celebrity or popular personality/public figure

6. Article
General articles on topics such as the arts, entertainment, music etc.


The cover shot and centrefolds are completed by the player. They're quite fun as you can choose different costumes for your models and get them pose and stuff that like that, while you control the camera, patiently waiting for the money shot, as it was.

You only have eight shots though, so make them count. The difference between a shoddy cover and perfect one can be thousands of dollars in revenue at the news-stands.

To get these photos, you'll need to hire a photographer, and to get the best shots both the model and camera operator have to be comfortable with each other, they have to form a relationship (not always purely professional), so spending time to introduce them is tantamount to success.


This model is posing for a Cover Shot


The small status box at the bottom of the screen
shows the targeted person's stats, whether they
like you or not and what kind of mood they're in

It's little things like this that make the game quite a buzz, and looking at your published magazine is quite rewarding, particularly when your financial and creative advisors praise you with your "Best photo shoot yet".

To get new and exciting interviews for the magazine, you not only need to hire a journalist (and the equipment that goes with the territory, such as a desk, a brewery etc.), but you'll need people to interview - special people, otherwise known as celebrities.

Via conversation, which is fun at first then a bit annoying because it's so slow, you can befriend these celebs at parties and what not, and simply ask for an interview.

Pictorials are taken care of out of sight, by your photographers, as are the articles, and all you need do is choose a theme or a topic.

Once everything is ready to go, you simply choose which articles will feature in an issue, which photos, and the colour of the front page graphics, and before you know it Bob's yer mums brother.

Interestingly, you can also set the price for the magazine (cheaper sells more, generally) and the ratio of advertisements to content. If you have 50% ads and 50% content, you'll probably sell less issues and make more cash with ad sales, but with a 35% ads and 65% content, sales usually improve.

We played the game on the consoles and though the GUI is pretty good, offering massive amounts of info in intuitively designed menus, one gets the impression that the PC version would be a good choice because of its native mouse support.

Graphically, PTM does it job, and not a lot else. If you like looking at multi-polygon, skin-mapped pendulous breasts, you'll probably like this game. In fact you'll adore it, because you can even choose what your guests wear, and if that involves nothing but a G-banger and some whipped cream, who are they to complain? You're the alpha rabbit!

There's a lot of nudity in the game, which will please naturalists and peeping toms alike, and also quite a bit of sex too, though it's more comical than outright raunchy. Manipulating the camera is easy, and the only thing that irked me about the gameplay was that old Mr. Hefner walks too slowly. You can speed up time, but this is purpose defeating if you're trying to head off a guest before they leave the mansion, as they speed up too.

There's a lot to this Playboy game, it's got plenty of depth, and I like value for money games too, so it gets two thumbs up from me. It's relatively easy to get into the thick of producing a magazine and living up the life of smut peddler, and there's so much customisation to be done - on characters and the mansion - that no two games (or even magazine issues) will be anywhere near the same.

From choking on my imported caviar at the first news of Playboy: The Mansion, I can now stand back, sip my Dom Perignon and say that Ubisoft hasn't sold it's soul to the devil. Rather than giving us a perv-fest with little else to offer, this game has substance and is actually a very good way to enjoy a rainy day indoors.

The control system is confusing at first (but well thought-out in the long run), there are great rewards for completing goals, and the sims/micro management feel to the game means that you'll invest a lot of time crafting Hef and his dubious mammary mansion in your own image, forging a real connection with the game.

It's not the best simulation out there, but it sure did catch me by surprise with it's sheer addictiveness. Well worth checking out.

Game: Playboy: The Mansion
System: PS2
Players: 1
Online: No
Developer: Arush Games / Cyberlore
Distributor: Ubisoft

Rating: 80%